yahoo and other agrevations

One thing I learned along this journey is how no one cares about others adoptions.Everyone(few exceptions ) are out for them selves. With all the issues of abandonment I decided to join a few yahoo groups for support and information.What I found were people bashing my agency and my friends and yes I got caught up in it.Maybe I said a few things I regret but not half as mean as the things said to me.I in turn decided to leave as there is enough stress in this journey.So i find out some are suspcious of my journey and posted my blog.So welcome to my new readers.What you will find here is my agonizing journey.One that I wouldnt wish on my worst enemy.All I have written is raw emotion and is the true me. I support my agency and my friends.My journey truely stinks but it is mine I am so emotionaly spent I can no longer deal with anyone other then my true friends.For those of you with your children home-they are home and be thankful-for those of you waiting-be thankful for what happened to me cause it caused great change for you. I am just a mother trying desperatly to get my daughter home and do not need to be attacked by the heartless

Sick to my stomach

Well I am starting to believe adoption just is not in our future. Our court date is less then 2 days away and it looks like its not happening. The ethiopian courts stopped hearing abandonment cases last friday and of course this effects us. I really can not express how I feel at this point.Im shakey and sick to the point of throwing up. I am seriuosly at the point that some meds may be in order. I cant sleep,breath or anything for that matter.Yet again we are so close and any hapiness coming to us has been ripped away. I was praying for some sorta miracle today but yet again the day is over and all I can do is cry.

Court Date!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday we recieved our court date -Are you ready for this MAY 15 yep 2 weeks away. The courts decided to expedite our case because we had lost a baby that was Legally Ours.So if all goes well and we pass court we leave may 27.I still can not believe it!!!!!!!!!!!! I am very excited and nervous at the same time.I think I will be a ball of nerves up until she is in our arms. God is good and I believe he will keep her safe til we get there.So let the madness begin-Packing,shopping,more shopping LOL.Oh and Peyton will be 2.5 months when placed in our arms.I can see some sunshine coming through the dark clouds!!!!